All of us unconsciously ask one of two questions, when we seek out a potential partner. We either ask: what can I do for you? This is the co-dependent. Or what can the other person do for me? This is the dependent.
Do you think these questions are healthy?
We unconsciously set up a situation where we are not on the same team. This creates the actor of love.
Do you want to transform your question?
In order to transform, we need to be truly autonomous/independent. Then we can ask: What can we do for each other. Doesn't that question sound better? Now, we are interdependent and become true lovers!
Do you want to attract a true lover?
"Self-Knowledge is the Jewel."-Serena Jade
Bringing unconscious wisdom to the world...
www.serenajade.com
Did you know codependency/dependency is the cause?
Best-selling author John Bradshaw said, "Codependency/dependency is the root of addiction."
Codependency/dependency is an unhealthy way to parent. Either the parents are not physically/emotionally there for the child and grows up to be the codependent person. Or the parents are there too much for the child and grows up to be the dependent person.
"All of us are addicted to something. So, that means we are all either codependent or dependent."-Serena Jade
I grew up codependent, I was assigned the role as the caretaker for my mother. My mother was dependent and logically, the natural order of parenting was reversed. I was abandoned and left with emotional scars. I am still recovering from the emotional distress and threat from my childhood.
I would say the biggest addiction for me is trying to control my life. This is a compulsive behavior-my addiction.
However, I am aware of my dysfunctional childhood. In the past twenty-months, I unwrapped my defense mechanisms that covered up the anxiety of my stressful childhood. Not an easy feat and I continue every day to achieve healthy boundaries and connect with my higher self!
Are you aware of your childhood?
Were your parents codependent or dependent?
"Self-Knowledge is the Jewel of all Knowledge."-Serena Jadewww.serenajade.co
The dictionary defines autonomy as: freedom from external influence or control.
"To be autonomous is the ultimate state of being because one has an internal strength to guard their space."-Serena Jade
I was a classic co-dependent.I took on the pseudo-independent role but I didn't have freedom.I thought about others approval and feelings more than my own.In so doing, there was a lot of shame and doubt in my head.
To be autonomous is to be empowered; this means one owns their freedom.When an empowered person gets into a relationship with a significant other - THE COMMON DOMINATE AND SUBSERVIENT: DOES NOT APPLY!
Are you ready to own your freedom?
Serena Jade
Author/Speaker/Body, Mind, and Soul Consultantwww.serenajade.co
