The Soul Mate Prep Blog#40: Are You Letting Fate or Free Will, Control your Destiny?

 "Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate."- Carl Jung

I was fated to be the caretaker for my mother.My mother imposed her free will onto me. I was not supposed to be happy or have a life of my own.

However, my free will gave me the wisdom to understand this dysfunctional interplay. My conscious awareness empowered me to make a wise choice and move toward my destiny.

I needed an emotional sense of self before I could take the journey to make a choice. It has been really, really hard to break away from my fate.

"The less self-awareness a person has, the more he is unfree.That is to say, the more he is controlled by inhibitions,  repressions, childhood conditioning which he has consciously "forgotten" but which still drive him unconsciously."-Rollo May

Are you letting fate or free will, control your destiny?

                            Serena Jade
                             www.serenajade.co

The Soul Mate Prep Blog#38: Do you think medication should be the main form of treatment for depression?

Last week, I received a link to watch, Andrew Solomon, a writer on politics, culture and psychology give a TED speech on depression.

In the comment box I write: Great talk...is medication the answer? In my experience, no! My dysfunctional upbringing was the cause and the effect was my depression.I have spent years undoing my unhealthy childhood.

I like the part in the speech Andrew says, "you relapse and relapse."

Depression is an important part of healing, because it is telling you issues that were once repressed are coming to the surface and needs to be brought into one's conscious mind.Medication will rob you of this precious gift!

I received a response about the medication issue and I said: I feel most get defensive when medication is viewed as a weakness.That is not what I am saying, I am saying in order to transform, we need to be in touch with the pain, so we can understand what the pain is saying! 

Medication robs us of the pain. We have a tendency to say everything is okay, when the pain is not there. Medication is a mask covering the pain.

Just Like, if your back hurts, your body is telling you something is wrong and needs attention.

Our mind is the same, the pain is telling us something is wrong and needs your attention. However, the answer is not right in front of us. That is where therapy and doing one's homework can and will, transform the unhealthy mindset, and after years will bring you a serene mind!

I received another response: The person says, I agree in part, but what if it is a chemical problem?

I answer: I feel if doctors viewed my brain years ago, they would have viewed a very different brain than what my brain looks like today. A different state of mind changes the molecules in your brain.

I feel if one goes into the psychotic phase, one needs medication. However, how many of us are going into the psychotic phase?

I came across an article I saved from 15-years ago it says," our society's medical insurance and how pharmaceutical companies attack Freud and Jung, and say we don't need therapy anymore, and that therapy doesn't do any good. Just take these pills. 

The whole advance in psychology made through suffering, all that is thrown away and you simply give people pills for their depression."

No one is going to tell me if I took pills years ago, I would be transformed.  The pain and my will to know myself gave me the greatest gift: I created myself into a whole person with a serene mind!

Therapy should be the main form of treatment for depression. Do you agree or disagree?

                           Serena Jade
Author/Speaker/Body, Mind, and Soul Consultant
www.serenajade.co

The Soul Mate Prep Blog#37: Are you ready for intimacy?

Autonomy: Freedom from external influence or control.

Confidence: Is a firm belief in one's powers, abilities, knowingness or capacities.

The ability to be autonomous and to have confidence will transform one's life. The opposite of these two aspects are shame and doubt.

When there is shame and doubt one's thought process is clouded. Either we are under-confident or overly-confident; the powerful and powerless.

Shame must be made into a feeling again and not a system of belief, where one is not good enough. Bring shame out in the open and doubt will cease. When one can do this... we will be secure, committed, compassionate and ready for intimacy!

Are you ready to become your potential?

                            Serena Jade
Author/Speaker/Body, Mind, and Soul Consultant
www.serenajade.com

The Soul Mate Prep Blog#36: Does matter and antimatter in physics mirror the ultimate soul mate?



A child's drawing of matter and antimatter at CERN!

Cern-The European Nuclear Research Center in Geneva-on the Franco-Swiss border.

Physics-comes from the Greek, "knowledge of nature." Physics is a science to understand how the universe behaves.

Every particle in the universe created out of the Big Bang appears to have a partner particle. Physicists right now only see matter. However, they understand the universe produced about as much  matter as antimatter.

When matter and antimatter meet they create a third entity-energy!

Physicists know matter and antimatter are always produced as a pair. The same energy but it's opposite charge, a mirror image. The ancients Greeks knew of the Atom but they couldn't prove it.

The matter and antimatter story could certainly mirror Plato's understanding, it was their very essence that had been split in two, so each half missed its other half.-Symposium

When matter and antimatter meet it is said, "they will annihilate or there will be an explosion of joy! "

Which do you want an annihilation or joy?

If you choose joy, then it takes a tremendous amount of inner understanding. Are you ready to take the arduous journey up steep hills and down vast valleys to reunite? 

                            Serena Jade

Author/Speaker/Body, Mind, and Soul Consultant

www.serenajade.co

The Soul Mate Prep Blog#35: Do you take life for granted?

It is believed dying by the River Ganges can improve one's past life actions: Varanasi, India

In the west, we have a mindset, we only live once. Our minds are influenced by our cultural/religious upbringing. We are taught if we live life as "good" people, this thing called the soul goes to heaven. If we lived a life as a "bad" person, this thing called the soul goes to hell.

In the east, people are influenced by their cultural/religious upbringing and believe they have lived many lives. They have a mindset their past lives influence their present life.

In the west, we think having lived here before is a joke. We poke fun at saying, I was so and so in a past life. However, when someone dies we say, this thing called the soul is in a better place.

What if this Earth is the better place and our minds are in hell?

Do you try to control your life?

Our personality/ego thinks it can control life, therefore we assume our body is immortal. However, are you aware of your authentic immortal part of you?

"The more we control, the more we take life for granted."-Serena Jade

Ideally, the power to direct our energy authentically is to take care of our body/mind and connect with our immortal soul-and transcend our past life actions. When we can achieve this, we are free and grateful knowing our mortal body is precious!

Are you ready to direct your energy into knowing yourself?

"Self-Knowledge is the Jewel."- Serena Jade
                                   www.serenajade.co


 

The Soul Mate Prep Blog#33: Do you want to hear a Fabulous Soul Mate/Twin Flame Song?

I can see it in your eyes
you're a spirit I recognize
feelings I can't explain
and I don't even know your name

Do we only live to die
or is it that our hearts are magnetized
and our worlds collide for a reason?

Been here many times before
with a different face from a different shore
both here to discover the other again

The above lyrics are from a new song by the British New Wave Band, Johnny Hates Jazz.Watch the video here: www.youtube.com/watch?v=7dvuv_KPFJk

I heard this song yesterday and I was "wowed" by it.I am considering it the official Soul Mate/Twin Flame song! The lyrics say it all, we have been here many times before, with a different face from a different shore.

My story Charismatic Connection, gives you a first hand experience about how Chris and I collided for a reason. We saw it in our eyes, two spirits identifying one another. We have a different face but have met many times before. Both of us were here to discover the other again, but this time becoming conscious of our immortal connection! 

Do you think we only live to die or are we here for a deeper reason?

"Self-Knowledge is the Jewel."-Serena Jade
Creating Awareness/Uplifting Society
Bringing unconscious Social/Spiritual wisdom to the world...
www.serenajade.co







 

The Soul Mate Prep Blog#32: When Soul Mates Connect...Are you ready for a paradigm shift?

We live in a secular world with the term soul mates floating around.The dictionary defines a soul mate as a person ideally suited as a close friend or romantic partner.What does this mean? Ideally suited for our personality? There is a difference between personality and soul, the immortal soul is not the personality/ego.

Do you know your soul?

The popular definition of soul mates is that someone is going to complete you. In this ideal relationship, both parties are unaware of their spiritual being.In fact, I bet both parties need the other person as opposed to wanting to be with the other for a higher purpose.

Soul mates have a connection on a deep unconscious level, unknown to their conscious mind until the right moment.A true soul mate connection implies an intense and powerful bond that transcends the personality/ego!

Do you want to go beyond your ego and mate with your soul's mates?

                            Serena Jade
Author/Speaker/Body, Mind, and Soul Consultant
www.serenajade.co





 

The Soul Mate Prep Blog#31: If you saw your 20 year-old self walking down the street, what would you say?

If I saw my 20 year-old self walking down the street-first I would give her a big hug. Then I would tell her it is going to be a long difficult road ahead.I would tell her the sooner she understands her personal history, the faster her suffering will dissipate...

I would tell my 20 year-old self: When you were little you repeatedly experienced the shame of abandonment.Your dysfunctional family gave you an environment where they said non verbally,"you are not important, you are not of value."

At age 5, you were on the school's playground feeling all alone, very scared. We are going to fast forward a few years, and you were at a friend's house, you must have been 7 or 8 years- old. Your so-called friend and another child locked you inside a room.They were making fun of you, telling you over again, you are not of value.You were very scared and ran home, you knew you couldn't tell your mother, she would not validate your feelings.So, you ran into your bedroom where you felt safe.

You hated school for the number 1 reason you repeatedly felt left out.However, that was what you were experiencing at home and the result was magnified at school.

When you look back at your life, you will be amazed on how you have survived. In the animal world, when a pup is left all alone without their clan-they are overpowered and killed by a predator.Your whole life you have been overpowered by mean and cruel people.You were taught to be Nice even if people are not Nice to you-a victim statement. 

My twenty year -old self-stand up for yourself and know deeply you are important and have lots of value..know it, believe it!

Would you encourage your 20 year- old self to look at their personal history? 

If not, know that their past is recreated in the present!

                           Serena Jade
Author/Speaker/Body, Mind, and Soul Consultant
www.serenajade.com





 

The Soul Mate Prep Blog#30: When will the power of love overcome the love of power?

The traditional marriage equals two separate people interacting with one another. Fast forward a year and a half and we have one person in charge for the both of them.
 
When one person wants control of the other, we love the power and not the person. Ideally, we have to figure out, what are the obstacles that prevent us from truly loving us. When we figure that out, we can mate with someone who loves us and not the power!

Do you want someone who loves Power or You?

"Self-Knowledge is the Jewel."-Serena Jade
                             www.serenajade.com

 

The Soul Mate Prep Blog#28: Do you think you are autonomous?

The dictionary defines autonomy as: freedom from external influence or control.

"To be autonomous is the ultimate state of being because one has an internal strength to guard their space."-Serena Jade

I was a classic co-dependent.I took on the pseudo-independent role but I didn't have freedom.I thought about others approval and feelings more than my own.In so doing, there was a lot of shame and doubt in my head.

To be autonomous is to be empowered; this means one owns their freedom.When an empowered person gets into a relationship with a significant other - THE COMMON DOMINATE AND SUBSERVIENT: DOES NOT APPLY!

Are you ready to own your freedom?


                            Serena Jade
Author/Speaker/Body, Mind, and Soul Consultant
www.serenajade.co

 

The Soul Mate Prep Blog#27: Would you sacrifice your survival, security, personal relationships for an invisible calling?

Joseph Campbell said, "A person who is gripped by a calling, by a dedication, by a belief, by a zeal will sacrifice their security, will sacrifice even their life, will sacrifice personal relationships, they will give themselves entirely to their purpose."

I am such a person who has heeded a call to honor my soul's purpose.I had to break away from my guilt-inducing narcissistic mother and follow my soul's voice. I left New York and came to the desert of California to establish myself as a role-model and as a writer of personal and spiritual wisdom.

I am dedicated to tell my story of my personal journey from understanding my own soul to recognizing a true eternal love. I am here to tell you my personality was not in a position to live a peaceful life with a profound love or with anyone else.

I am here to tell you what I discovered along my arduous journey towards self- realization.It is not easy following an invisible path because you are not following the laws of our society.It takes tremendous faith in yourself that you are following the right path for you.

Are you ready to heed such a call?
www.serenajade.co




 

The Soul Mate Prep Blog#26: Are some parents too permissive?

I would like to quote John Sanford, a Jungian analyst...it does not help a child to have parents who are permissive toward all kinds of behavior.In a permissive atmosphere a child's capacity to develop their own monitoring system is blunted.The ego development will then be too weak to enable the child as an adult to cope.

My parents were anything but permissive.However, I don't condone the way my parents especially my mother parented me.However, I do know if they were permissive, my personality would not have the strength to handle the pain and to overcome the dysfunctional family system I was born in.

I was watching, The Piers Morgan Show the other night and Piers was interviewing, Pastor Rick Warren and his wife.In my opinion, the Warren's were permissive with their mentally ill son, who just recently committed suicide. Rick Warren and his wife knew their son purchased an illegal gun.

Do you think it is acceptable to witness your child (who is unstable) have a gun in their possession?

Piers Morgan I feel is a hypocrite, he has been going on and on about stricter gun laws.However, he did not challenge the Warren's on why they did not do anything knowing their mentally ill son had an illegal gun and could have killed others too.

Shouldn't we protect our loved ones from harm?

I know one cannot stop someone from hurting themselves or others but we can do everything possible to prevent such an occurrence.

Ultimately, it is the parents job to instill moral behavior in their child.That means, it is the parent's job not to be too permissive nor too strict but somewhere in between. Parents should have knowledge of their own psychological history, so we can create mentally whole healthy children.

When I was younger, I thought I was the mentally ill person in my family.After years of being an explorer of my own personal history, I discovered it was not me who was mentally ill but my mother and her father before her and so and so on...

Are you ready to take accountability for your child's mental health?

                            Serena Jade
Author/Speaker/Body, Mind, and Soul Consultant
www.serenajade.co

The Soul Mate Prep Blog#25: Do you know love is a name we give for the pursuit of wholeness?

In an ordinary enchantment, we are attracted to someone for two reasons...

1.We are sexually attracted to their appearance.

2.The other person has the missing personality traits we need to be whole.

When we get involved in this relationship it feels wonderful in the beginning.Plato understood this phenomenon and said 2500 years ago, "Love is just a name we give to the desire and pursuit of wholeness."

We feel elated and euphoric however, this sense of enlightenment does not last for long.

Why do you think this is?

The other person is temporarily making you feel whole.But this is a false sense of wholeness.After the initial phase both people start to create power struggles with the missing trait; projected onto the other person.

Instead of marrying this person, we can be in a relationship with them...I call this a potential growth relationship because we can transform into a whole person!

"When we are whole, we can partner with our soul's mates." - Serena Jade

Are you ready to be in a personal growth relationship?

                            Serena Jade
Author/Speaker/Body, Mind, and Soul Consultant

The Soul Mate Prep Blog#24: Where were you on September 11, 2002?

September 11, 2001, will be forever etched in my mind, as well as the whole United States. Growing up, I marveled at the Twin Towers and on a clear day you could see them from miles away.

The morning of 9/11, was one of those rare beautiful New York days.There wasn't a cloud in the sky and the temperature was going to be in the 80's...

What I witnessed, the following year on September 11, 2002, is just as profound.Collectively, everyone in New York and the country if not the world focused on the first anniversary.

The departed souls and everyone thinking about the same event created such an intense all-consuming wind that whipped through the entire tri-state area of New York.The strong gusts were extreme and everyone knew the souls who died on 9/11 were with us.

Do you think it is possible to change the world, if large numbers of people came together thinking the same thought?

                            Serena Jade
Author/Speaker/Body, Mind, and Soul Consultant
www.serenajade.co
 

The Soul Mate Prep Blog#23: Do you want Cinderella's fantasy?

What little girl doesn't want to be Cinderella?

We grow up in a world hearing this fairy tale.However, the real Cinderella is on house-arrest, taking care of her step-mother and two-step sisters.Her sisters are Good, Respected and have a life of their own.

In order to just survive, Cinderella has to create a fantasy...her step-mother and sisters are visible, good and respected.Cinderella is invisible, bad, worthless and disrespected.

In Cinderella's mind, her mother and sisters have to be good, otherwise she couldn't survive.This fantasy is like a mirage in the desert.Cinderella needs this fantasy, it is her life support.

Just like, if you were out in the blazing hot sun in the middle of the desert with no water to drink.The fantasy that an oasis is ahead keeps you alive but barely.Sooner or later, you are going to drop and die, if you don't get to an oasis.

Cinderella finds her oasis within...her shame comes out of hiding and thus is seen and respected. Now, she can meet her Prince and can live happily ever after!

This transformation has taken years to accomplish.She has extinguished her fantasy bond with her cruel mother and sisters and creates her real life dream...

Knowing Cinderella's fantasy: Do you want the fantasy or the real life dream?

                            Serena Jade
Author/Speaker/Body, Mind, and Soul Consultant
www.serenajade.co

The Soul Mate Prep Blog#22: Do you think children should be the love of your life?

Years ago, a friend of mine said to me, "People don't care about loving one's body, or being a friend to one's significant other." She said, "People want security above anything else."

My friend did get married to someone she had no connection with, other than to feel secure. Days after the wedding they slept in separate rooms, and came together just for sex.

I stopped talking to her and years later she befriended me on Facebook. We corresponded via e-mail and she told me she has two children, a boy and girl. She came from a broken home and was an only child. She grew up becoming best friends with her mother. She didn't have a relationship with her father and even became resentful of men.

As we were conversing back and forth, I got the feeling which I knew all along that she would recreate the same scenario with her life. She has a very close relationship with her daughter and the husband is there to provide for her security. She views her daughter as a gift from God and not her son. So, she has become best friends with the daughter and the husband and son are on the sidelines watching their close bond.

"Since it was my responsibility to take care of my mother. I know it is not healthy to think of children as a substitute for loving one's self or as a substitute for a great relationship."-Serena Jade

Children need their own life and the parents do too!  

Do you feel your children are the love of your life?

                            Serena Jade
Author/Speaker/Body, Mind, and Soul Consultant
www.serenajade.co

 

The Soul Mate Prep Blog#21: Are you sweeping the garbage out of your life?

Are you breaking the cycle?

In my own experience, one has to break the cycle inwardly.Whatever unhealthy thought/emotional system and behaviors we encounter growing up need to be transformed within.This takes a certain amount of knowledge and determination.However, once achieved the debris is not just brushed under the rug but swept up and thrown out!

Do you have the tenacity to stick to such a quest?

Serena Jade

Author/Speaker/Body, Mind, and Soul Consultant

www.serenajade.co

The Soul Mate Prep Blog#20: What is the difference between Pure-Desire vs.Longing?

Pure desire: is authentic and you are worthy of all good things.Your mind and emotions are working as a team.In your mind's eye, you are envisioning abundance and are looking forward to watching the overflowing of riches manifest. You are at a place of no doubt!

Longing: is a desperate yearning, wanting.A despair that if you don't have such and such, you feel like you are not going to survive.You are full of doubt and unworthiness,your mind and emotions are not on the same team.

Hinduism and Buddhism talk about being non-attached and being attached-leads to suffering.Non-attachment is the authentic desire.Attachment says,we desire a certain result and fear the result will not be obtained.

Clearly attachment is full of doubt and non-attachment exudes confidence.After years and years of trying to figure this wisdom out...

In my life, if I didn't care one way or the other that means I was detached- life flowed.However, when I yearned as opposed to a pure-desire, life didn't bring me my desired result because I was full of unworthiness and lack!

Being detached should not be how this wisdom works because if one is following their soul's wisdom, having the attitude one doesn't care is not suitable for living from a deep place. So, detachment should mean- a sense of being alive with the mind and emotions working together, where one knows they are worthy and knows of no lack = the ultimate-this is the law of attraction!  

                            Serena Jade
Author/Speaker/Body, Mind, and Soul Consultant
www.serenajade.co.

The Soul Mate Prep Blog#19: Are you balancing your heart?

The heart center is a valuable place within us.Here we have two important aspects, the dependent and caretaker.Usually, but not always the mother and father are the caretakers for their children and the child is the dependent one.Ideally, this child grows up having both the aspects of the dependent and caretaker within.So, when the child gets into a relationship with a significant other, they should be able to depend on one another and be the caretaker for each other...this is a true interdependent relationship!

 

Are you ready for this evolved relationship? 

 

Serena Jade

Author/Speaker/Body, Mind, and Soul Consultant

 

The Soul Mate Prep Blog#17: What is a Mezuzah?

 

A Mezuzah is a holy prayer,"Hear o' Israel, the Lord our God, the Lord is one," and is encased in a decorative covering.

 

A Mezuzah is placed on the front door and inside the doors of a Jewish home.It is said in the book of Deuteronomy, "place the Shema on the knob posts of your house." Every time you look upon the Mezuzah, you are reminded of the Divine's presence within and without.

 

Do you want a blessing for your home?

 

Place a holy prayer on the front door and connect with the Divine within and without!

 

Serena Jade

Author/Speaker/Body, Mind, and Soul Consultant

www.serenajade.co